Other than the "All You Zombies" plot ("AYZ" being a classic Heinlein story in which a time-travelling FtM manipulates zirself into impregnating zirself, who then goes on to give birth to zirself), my main idea for this fic was to write the indulgent story you had too much restraint to write--and then to take it all away. Which of course I would never have dreamt of doing if I were remixing any other author, but seemed to work particularly well as a reflection of this fic specifically. (Using "AYZ" as my inspiration for this remix probably came from the solipsistic character of the dreamworlds you created in the original; Heinlein really mixes the solipsistic worldview that results from having given birth to oneself.)
I had completely forgotten that poll, despite having voted in it.
Agreed about you not being, exactly, the woman in the White Room. But then no writer who appears within a work is really the writer of the work itself. My inspiration for the White Room scene was Anna Kovsky's "A Critique of Pure Reason" in which she speaks to Dom in the White Room as she types on a typewriter, but the real Kovsky is (well, was, really) writing in a notebook while being bored in class. Your eyes can never see themselves--only their reflection, which my remix attempts to provide in a way. (And you can't use a pencil to write a name on itself.)
I really don't think of this fic as either Ari/River or Lilah/River, certainly not the way that "Dear My Ideal Audience" or "The Fairest of Them All" are, although I considered the possibility of going ther Lilah/River route. I decided against it not only because I thought the story screamed that I had written it enough as it was, but also because, oddly enough considering, sexualized relationships seemed strangely out of place within it. I did consider stealing more elements from "Ideal Audience" as well--in particular, the "My God why have you forsaken me?" line--but I decided it against it for a similar manifold of reasons. And of course I've transferred some of the things you've actually said about, I believe, Wesley, over to River.
This is only the second remix I've written, and this one breaks the rules in so many ways, but I think in general the culmination of a remix I've written will be a scene that didn't appear in the original, since I'm telling a completely new narrative based on the same sequence of events. I don't think I'd typically be this far removed from the original--I'd stay in the same universe, typically--but of course "Incurable" draws attention to the radical possibility of what lies beyond itself.
The second person was an element that I knew would in part serve to identify my authorship, since I use it so much, but I couldn't think of a way to tell the story without it. And yes, I love some of the sentences I was able to priduce thanks to the bifurcation of the "you." The "inexorable truths" line was added late in the game, because I thought the language in general wasn't as beautiful enough as behooved an Ari fic.
I realize this: that I-as-writer had intial ultimate control, and "precious grand illusions" is an excellent name for the massive way in which "Incurable" is wish-fulfillment fic for me and River is my Mary Sue, and then I-as-reader of this fic lost, as readers do, that kind of control over the text, which acts on me (which is a nice reversal of the sense in which River has more agency [though perhaps not more autonomy] in your fic than in mine; River's agency is inverted to mine), but then the text literally invites me to take control again and serves as a personal chastisement (which is in no wise a bad thing) given my very large desire to have people other-than-me save me, or save me from myself.
About 2/3 of that is intentional.
Thank you for the wonderful feedback, and I'm glad you enjoyed the remix. Thank you so much for the original stor(y)(ies), for the years of discussion, and for so much more. You've been a blessing to all of us.
(I like to imagine the universe in which this fic was written by a very adept stalker.)
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Re: also because I know it will drive you nuts that you have to wait till reveal to discuss [2]
Date: 2007-04-29 06:46 pm (UTC)I had completely forgotten that poll, despite having voted in it.
Agreed about you not being, exactly, the woman in the White Room. But then no writer who appears within a work is really the writer of the work itself. My inspiration for the White Room scene was Anna Kovsky's "A Critique of
Pure Reason" in which she speaks to Dom in the White Room as she types on a typewriter, but the real Kovsky is (well, was, really) writing in a notebook while being bored in class. Your eyes can never see themselves--only their reflection, which my remix attempts to provide in a way. (And you can't use a pencil to write a name on itself.)
I really don't think of this fic as either Ari/River or Lilah/River, certainly not the way that "Dear My Ideal Audience" or "The Fairest of Them All" are, although I considered the possibility of going ther Lilah/River route. I decided against it not only because I thought the story screamed that I had written it enough as it was, but also because, oddly enough considering, sexualized relationships seemed strangely out of place within it. I did consider stealing more elements from "Ideal Audience" as well--in particular, the "My God why have you forsaken me?" line--but I decided it against it for a similar manifold of reasons. And of course I've transferred some of the things you've actually said about, I believe, Wesley, over to River.
This is only the second remix I've written, and this one breaks the rules in so many ways, but I think in general the culmination of a remix I've written will be a scene that didn't appear in the original, since I'm telling a completely new narrative based on the same sequence of events. I don't think I'd typically be this far removed from the original--I'd stay in the same universe, typically--but of course "Incurable" draws attention to the radical possibility of what lies beyond itself.
The second person was an element that I knew would in part serve to identify my authorship, since I use it so much, but I couldn't think of a way to tell the story without it. And yes, I love some of the sentences I was able to priduce thanks to the bifurcation of the "you." The "inexorable truths" line was added late in the game, because I thought the language in general wasn't as beautiful enough as behooved an Ari fic.
I realize this: that I-as-writer had intial ultimate control, and "precious grand illusions" is an excellent name for the massive way in which "Incurable" is wish-fulfillment fic for me and River is my Mary Sue, and then I-as-reader of this fic lost, as readers do, that kind of control over the text, which acts on me (which is a nice reversal of the sense in which River has more agency [though perhaps not more autonomy] in your fic than in mine; River's agency is inverted to mine), but then the text literally invites me to take control again and serves as a personal chastisement (which is in no wise a bad thing) given my very large desire to have people other-than-me save me, or save me from myself.
About 2/3 of that is intentional.
Thank you for the wonderful feedback, and I'm glad you enjoyed the remix. Thank you so much for the original stor(y)(ies), for the years of discussion, and for so much more. You've been a blessing to all of us.
(I like to imagine the universe in which this fic was written by a very adept stalker.)